just yesterday, i was vacuuming and moved this heavy carpet and a baby lizard scuttled across the floor less than 1 metre away from me. and i SCREAMED. if anyone's ever heard me scream before, you would know how it sounds like.
i seriously seriously believe that i will make a good victim-on-teevee, you know, the kind who gets into trouble or sees a murderer and screams her lungs off... heh.
and i realise that due to lack of english/malay/gp lessons, my efficiency in both languages are starting to fail me. i used to correct people's grammar and pronunciation all the time, but now, people have to correct me. *sigh* i hope this ineffciency in constructing grammatically-correct sentences all the time will not start to invade into my writing. erk.
this is so off-track seriously:
due to having a freaking lot of time to actually think, i realise that people don't actually mean what they say. they say things in such absolute terms. 'i HATE (a certain tye of people)/(a certain type of music)/(anything else which you think you 'hate')' etc etc.. i mean, really, have you ever really sit down and think thru what you really hate? there're not many things to hate you know. and i don't understand the need to look down on other people too. like you know, in terms of educational institutions, jobs or social standings.
and what is it about paper qualification that everyone's racing after? i sometimes question myself, why am i here, in NUS, doing so and so. is it that important to have a degree or masters? can't i be happier elsewhere, where i don't need to be bogged down by this constant pressure to perform. cos honestly, my last exams freak me out. i have NEVER felt pressure of any kind when i sat for my Os or the As (and i seriously mean no pressure, belajar macam nak buat kuih.. hahaha), yet i was such a bundle of nerves during my first semester exams.. it was something new, something i don't like.. and i ask myself, is this necessary?
and then there's the talk of the small market for life science/biomedical science graduates and seriously, it's starting to scare me. the stakes are riskier as you go higher up the ladder, cos it's all the harder for you to back down. what if you screw up just as you are about to reach the top? what, start all the way from the bottom again? what if you've lost the drive?
i hate asking, cos sometimes the answers scare me... =s
on a different note, i can't wait for school or at least something interesting to start. i'm getting bored from just 2 days at home. i mean, how much vacuuming and dusting can i do? the dust just keeps coming back. hmprh!
this is so random.
i seriously seriously believe that i will make a good victim-on-teevee, you know, the kind who gets into trouble or sees a murderer and screams her lungs off... heh.
and i realise that due to lack of english/malay/gp lessons, my efficiency in both languages are starting to fail me. i used to correct people's grammar and pronunciation all the time, but now, people have to correct me. *sigh* i hope this ineffciency in constructing grammatically-correct sentences all the time will not start to invade into my writing. erk.
this is so off-track seriously:
due to having a freaking lot of time to actually think, i realise that people don't actually mean what they say. they say things in such absolute terms. 'i HATE (a certain tye of people)/(a certain type of music)/(anything else which you think you 'hate')' etc etc.. i mean, really, have you ever really sit down and think thru what you really hate? there're not many things to hate you know. and i don't understand the need to look down on other people too. like you know, in terms of educational institutions, jobs or social standings.
and what is it about paper qualification that everyone's racing after? i sometimes question myself, why am i here, in NUS, doing so and so. is it that important to have a degree or masters? can't i be happier elsewhere, where i don't need to be bogged down by this constant pressure to perform. cos honestly, my last exams freak me out. i have NEVER felt pressure of any kind when i sat for my Os or the As (and i seriously mean no pressure, belajar macam nak buat kuih.. hahaha), yet i was such a bundle of nerves during my first semester exams.. it was something new, something i don't like.. and i ask myself, is this necessary?
and then there's the talk of the small market for life science/biomedical science graduates and seriously, it's starting to scare me. the stakes are riskier as you go higher up the ladder, cos it's all the harder for you to back down. what if you screw up just as you are about to reach the top? what, start all the way from the bottom again? what if you've lost the drive?
i hate asking, cos sometimes the answers scare me... =s
on a different note, i can't wait for school or at least something interesting to start. i'm getting bored from just 2 days at home. i mean, how much vacuuming and dusting can i do? the dust just keeps coming back. hmprh!
this is so random.
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